Money does not buy happiness, but it pays my internet, which is almost the same thing.

sodamnrelatable:

image

more relatable?

(Source: epic-humor)

bjokr:

introducing myself in the first day of school

image

(via hotboyproblems)

(via trust)

skylarduquette:

"no" is too serious

"nope" is too casual

"nah" is just right

"Did you kill this man?" "Nah"

(Source: bound2014, via cumfort)

illkim:

"You smoke?"

"Only recreationally"

image

(via romneylover)

premiium:

there’s a difference between “lazy” and “i don’t want to fucking do that shit”

(via romneylover)

dieceased:

remember that one time you called your teacher mom

(Source: gojikas, via romneylover)

meladoodle:

*at job interview* Oh yes, my criminal record? The only thing illegal I’ve done is absolutely KILLIN it on the dancefloor. Haha, just kidding! I have killed a man

(via hotboyproblems)